Child psychology divorce dating
"Divorce may dissolve the spousal relationship, but the parenting relationship must always remain intact and the number one priority."This may be true, but your kids aren't equipped to understand this in the context of adult relationships."Children should never know the intimate details about why their parents divorced, especially when one parent doesn't love the other anymore," says Vikki S Ziegler, family law attorney and author."If you can't come to an agreement about the children's physical and legal care, then it will be left to the Court to decide."No divorce is ever entirely one person's fault, and placing blame or offering up excuses only hurts children."Parents often think that children can handle adult reasoning but that is not always the case," Sodoma says.
D., a clinical psychologist specializing in children and adolescents.But a parent's decision to divorce is never a child's fault, says Bogatay. "Instead, offer emotional support and positive reassurance that both parents will always love them, no matter what.""Your children are not responsible for your happiness," says Vanessa Lapointe, Ph. "Your child may begin to feel badly for time spent with the other parent, may start to hide their happiness, may carry a sense of guilt that they aren't spending more time with you, and worst of all, may begin to reject time with the other parent in order to take care of the need you just burdened them with."Because they're often first-hand witnesses to much of the conflict, children often end up at the center of their parents' disputes during a divorce, says Kimberli Withrow, partner and family lawyer with Boyd Collar Nolen & Tuggle.But this puts them in a terrible situation, forcing them to "tell on" one or both parents."Avoid putting them in this position by remembering that one of the reasons that you get a divorce is so your children have an opportunity to see a happier, healthier relationship."If your kids ask for reassurance, don't fall back on this line — it does sometimes happen, but it's extremely unlikely, says James Bogatay, a divorce lawyer in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania."Don't make any open promises of future mending of your relationship just to offer reassurance in the moment.